Invisible
by Omegathyst
Summary: What if Eleanor didn't just say that she might be into Tahani in the Good Place season finale, but she goes on to say that she's in love with her? When Tahani rejects her with lingering feelings for Chidi, Eleanor writes a note to herself to make sure she never falls in love with Tahani when she loses her memories. But will she fall for Tahani all over again anyway? One-shot.


**Eleanor's POV**

"An idiot DJ, a tortured academic, a hot rich fraud with _legs for days_...sidenote, I might _legit_ be into Tahani..."

Then I thought: what was going to happen after all this? Were we just going to be sent to other Bad Place neighborhoods to be physically tortured? Would I never see Tahani again? The thought was enough to scare me, and if that was what would most likely happen, I needed to be real here. Because 'might legit be into Tahani' didn't even _begin_ to cover it.

"No, I'm not _into_ Tahani. I'm _in love_ with Tahani!" I announced, with my back still facing her. Silence hit the room for a few moments before Michael raised an eyebrow at me in amusement.

"You do realize that she's in love with Chidi right? You said it yourself a few minutes ago!" Michael laughed. "Oh what joy! Another variable in the long net of variables of torture! Not only is Tahani upset that Chidi doesn't love her, but _you_ love her! You've really dug a hole for yourself with this sad confession of yours, Eleanor."

"That...shut up, let me get to the point. We improved each other and I became a better person. The only thing you did was brought us all together." I finished as confidently as I could, hiding my bruised ego. Unfortunately Michael got an idea to reset our memories and left to 'get the boss-man's approval.' So much for that love confession.

It seemed to be taking a lot longer than I expected so I was heading over to grab a piece of paper when Tahani stood in my way.

"You don't need to tell me, I get it. You like Chidi and not me. But you two aren't exactly 'two sophisticates' now." I sighed. "You'll never love me, but it's not like you're too good for me Tahani. All I wanted was you, and I guess things will never work out."

 _"I'm_ not too good for you?" Tahani said in disbelief. "You're being bitter and you're implying that we're on the same level? Even if it was just for selfish reasons, I still made the world a better place than it was before. All you did find different places to get drunk and steal shrimp!"

"At least _I_ can acknowledge that I was selfish, you still think that you're better than me!" I retorted, my heart breaking.

"Gee, you really sound like you're in love with me like you say you are! I thought I was 'impressive, brilliant, and perfect' Tahani in your eyes." Tahani sneered.

"I never said you were perfect. And if I did, then I would be in love with the _idea_ of you. You think I didn't know about your condescending attitude and your pride before Michael revealed that this is the Bad Place? Well I did, but I fell in love with you anyway. It's like you said Tahani...love can be complicated, but it can also be so simple. You're beautiful, but you're also broken...but so am I. You want to be loved and appreciated because you don't think you're enough. You try to be proud of your own accomplishments because your own _parents_ weren't so you must convince everyone else to be proud. But I love you and I appreciate you just the way you are, _I_ think you're enough. You don't have to hide your pain anymore Tahani. We're all probably going to lose our memories anyway..."

I reached my hand out to hold her's but she moved two steps back, her eyes welling up with tears.

"I...can't. I don't feel that way, my feelings for Chidi can't just disappear. And I can't possibly believe that you and me are on the same level. I've done so much for the world, charities, a-and helpless children everywhere! _My life's work was_ ** _for nothing!"_** Tahani sobbed, running to the couch to cry onto Chidi's shoulder. Chidi was too shocked to move away at first, but after a few seconds he got up.

"I...need some fresh air." Chidi ran out of the house, leaving me, Tahani, and the two confused lovebirds Jason and Janet.

And Tahani's rejection hurt... ** _a lot_** more than I thought it would. I realized that tears were streaming down my face, and I felt a sudden urge to cry in despair like Tahani was. Not only did she say that she still loved Chidi, but she couldn't even admit that we weren't too different despite my love confession that I put _so much_ heart into, even as she was putting me down over and over again. **_Does she not even like me?_**

"Oh n-no..." I whispered as the thought hit me like a stack of bricks. That can't be it, _oh no that can't be it._ ** _Oh dear God that cannot be it._**

I finally broke as I collapsed near the table and kept sobbing, not even looking at the beautiful lady that I never thought would break my heart. She was sobbing about her unrequited for Chidi and her life's work, not caring that she had took my heart and stomped it multiple times in the process. I knew that Tahani had flaws, but I never knew that she would stoop to this level.

And when I remembered that we would be losing our memories, I realized something very important: _this cannot happen again._

I took a piece of paper and started writing.

 **Tahani's POV**

 _Why me?!_ I made so many people happy, but it didn't matter! Even if I was being a little selfish, didn't I deserve some form of happiness? When my sobbing broke into hiccups, I could hear Eleanor sobbing and my heart dropped. I thought she was mad at me...but I didn't think she really loved me! I thought that she was just trying to break my walls and make me admit what a bad person I am.

I looked up from the couch to see Eleanor facing away from me, writing furiously on a piece of paper. I winced when I saw a teardrop land on the paper... _oh no,_ why does this always happen? Whenever I didn't get my way back on Earth, I would become a storm of rage and anger that didn't care about who I hurt. And I probably broke Eleanor...sweet Eleanor who confessed her love to me. Even if it was in her own insecure way.

"Eleanor, I'm sorry." I whispered. "I didn't mean all those things I s-said, I'm just so devastated by everything's that's happened."

Eleanor didn't answer, she kept writing on the paper.

"Ellie...I care about you a lot. Maybe if I hadn't realized that Chidi drew me that painting when I found Jason out...maybe things would've been different." I admitted, realizing that I never really loved Chidi. I loved that he cared about me and nothing more. And come to think of it, Eleanor and I spent a lot more wonderful memories together...

 ** _...memories that I burned to ashes in front of Eleanor's eyes._**

The first time we hung out as we delivered food baskets, us hanging out together to avoid fighting over Chidi, that fun memory where we were the only two people invited to Janet and Jason's wedding, and so many little interactions here and there that I took for granted... ** _oh._**

 _Eleanor doesn't deserve me after all, I'm even worse than I thought._

"It's too late, I'll never be good enough for you will I?" Eleanor said coldly, and I deserved it nonetheless. She got up and made it to Janet in only a few quick steps. "You can't swallow can you Janet?"

"Nope!"

"Great! Open up!" Eleanor placed a wedged piece of paper in Janet's mouth, and in a very rare moment, Janet hugged Eleanor. Eleanor hugged her back and sniffled before walking to the other side of the room.

"What did you write?" I asked.

"What I had to, this will never happen again." Eleanor responded. Michael walked into the room moments later.

"Well unfortunately I didn't get to hear all the drama, but I sure heard a lot of commotion." Michael snickered. "I said that I was going for a slow burn in the next reset, but who knows? Maybe I'll get you two to run into each other first! Or maybe I'll make Chidi and Tahani soulmates. There's so many fun possibilities, don't you think Eleanor?"

"Not really, there's no way I'm falling in love with that proud giraffe again." Eleanor locked eyes with me and I looked away from her venomous gaze.

"I sincerely doubt that, now let's try again shall we?" Michael decided.

 **Eleanor's POV**

I gave a small smile, happy that these painful memories would soon cease to exist. And what I wrote should be enough for memory-erased me to never speak to her again. And the worst part was despite all the hurtful things Tahani said, _I still loved her._

"Eleanor, _don't do this-"_

Michael snapped his fingers, and everything whited out.

* * *

"I was rebooted, and I found this paper in my mouth."

Huh? The lady that appeared out of nowhere and scared the crap out of me handed me a crumpled piece of paper and I opened it up:

 **Don't speak to Tahani Al-Jamil, you will fall in love with her and she _will_ break your heart!**

 **I'm serious, _STAY AWAY FROM HER!_**

 **-Past Eleanor (btw, ya lost your memories. Don't tell Michael)**

"W-wha?" I stammered, wildly confused.

"Must've been an awful experience, I can't remember what happened before my last reboot though." The lady looked slightly sympathetic. "I'm Janet by the way, let me know if you want anything. Maybe ice cream?"

"Why ice cream?"

"My own studies show it's a common food for people to 'eat their emotions away' with." Janet stated.

"Well, I can't be that upset because I don't even remember what happened. But...I'll take a bowl of mint chip." I decided, even _I'm_ not stupid enough to turn down free food. Janet's cheery smile returned to her face and she disappeared for a moment, returning with a bowl of deliciousness.

I sat down by myself and tucked the note in my pocket as I ate ice cream, wondering what the heck happened before I supposedly lost my memories. Was I the only one to lose my memories, or did everyone else in this neighborhood lose their memories? Did this 'Tahani' woman remember anything?

After a lot of thinking, I decided that I could only trust what the letter said and avoid Tahani.

* * *

After several weeks of awkwardness with my 'soulmate' Chris, I decided to get out of the house and go to the mall. But oddly enough, the mall was completely empty...well, _almost_ empty.

When I walked down a aisle full of beautiful and extravagant clothing, I saw a tall and undeniably gorgeous woman looking over clothes in another aisle. My heart started thumping until it occurred to me that this woman could be Tahani. I took three dresses from the clothing aisle and took off as silently as possible, hoping to avoid her.

 **Tahani's POV**

I was admiring a beautiful ocean blue dress with daisies on it when I saw something move in the corner of my eye. I looked away from the dress to see a blonde woman running away with three dresses, and it admittedly piqued my interest.

"Dear, why are you running?" I asked the blonde woman, who froze in her tracks. She glanced at me like a fish out of water, trying to come up with the best excuse possible. Maybe she doesn't like talking to people?

"I...like to work out?" She was lying. I approached her and I took her hand.

"It's okay, I don't bite." I smiled. "You have a great taste in dresses, care if I see them on you?"

The blonde woman blushed and nodded slowly, walking back into the mall and towards the dressing room. I sympathized with the woman that I assumed was an introvert and I waited outside of the dressing room.

 **Eleanor's POV**

It's not like I'd fall in love with this woman if I stayed as her friend, that is _if_ she is Tahani. If she isn't, then I'll more than gladly seduce her.

"Could you at least tell me your name?" I asked the gorgeous woman that was on the other side of the dressing room.

"It's Tahani! And your name?"

 _Of course._

"Eleanor S-Shellstrop." I stammered as I was putting on a rosy pink dress hesitantly. I knew I had to find a way to get out of here, do I just tell her what I know?

"...have we ever met before?" I asked.

"Not that I know of, were you raised in England?" Tahani answered in the most innocent tone possible.

"No, I was born in Phoenix." I sighed, walking out of the dressing room with the rosy pink dress on. "I need to tell you something, I found a note that I need to show you to prevent anything from happening."

I walked up to her and gave her the paper that I was holding onto. She read over it and her eyes widened.

"Who gave you this?" Tahani asked.

"Janet gave it to me and told me that she found it in her mouth." I replied. "It's probably best if we go our separate-"

"How can you be so sure that it's from you if you supposedly 'lost your memories?'" Tahani protested. "And even if it was from you, we can still be friends right?"

"I...I suppose we can try to be just friends." I decided, already regretting my decision. "I'm going to go back in the dressing room n-now."

I was madly blushing by the time I walked back in the dressing room, absentmindedly staring at the red dress I was going to put on. Little did I know that things were going to go further downhill from there.

* * *

 **Later that day**

As I suspected, we had a blast at the mall. I tried on ten more dresses before it was Tahani's turn to make my nose bleed with her outfits. After we put the clothes near the mall entrance to take home later, me and Tahani tried on various jewelry, and then we bought cotton candy to eat on the water fountain.

It was so much fun...no, it was suspiciously _too much_ fun. And now I can't help but wonder what she did to me that was so awful that I had to warn myself. I glanced over at my new friend who happened to be glancing at me at the same time. Finally, she spoke.

"I'm sorry, but I really think that note was used to mess with your head. After all, why would we have our memories erased. This is the Good Place!" Tahani looked away from me when she spoke again. "Although, it feels like we've known each other for a long time. But that be because I'm growing quite fond of you, more than you wanted me to."

"Are you saying-" Tahani nodded, but we just technically met today! How could she already be attracted to me. And was I willing to throw away the advice that I so carefully planned out for my future self?

I couldn't believe it, I was _seriously_ about to fall in love with Tahani Al-Jamil all over again. And I almost didn't care about the consequences.

"We just met, but I think I'm willing to dismiss the advice that my past self gave me. Instead of getting into a relationship right away though, let's try to get to know each other better." I smiled and placed my hand on Tahani's. Tahani smiled back and we continued talking, although she looked confused when I told her about my life.

"You...sold fake medicine to the elderly? Then why are you in the Good Place?" Tahani asked.

"I..." **_Shit._** "...honestly don't know. I don't even know why I did it in the first place, or why I did a lot of the things I did on Earth. But the Good Place approved every single one of us, and Michael told me that they never make mistakes. I really want to become a better person, but does that mean you don't want to be with me?"

"Of course not. If anything, I want to show you all the ways you could become a better person. My heart tells me to pursue you, so there must be good _in_ you." Tahani insisted. "I believe we can make this work and more my darling. Come back to my mansion, I'll tell you about all the things I did on Earth."

I followed Tahani out of the mall and I thought I saw a figure overhearing us. I remembered what my letter said about Michael and reminded myself that he was most likely not one to be trusted.

There were still unspoken secrets in this place, and I couldn't help wondering if any of us were safe, or if my relationship with Tahani was destined to fall apart.


End file.
